Reconciliation - Better Had in Real Life Than in Hollywood.



Hollywood. You've got to love how they neatly package life into two hour segments; resolving all conflicts, making everyone happy and closing all loose ends in a short span of time. If only life were really like this.



I recently watched a movie that I initially really liked. I rented "Talk to Me," the story of sixties and seventies era shock jock Petey Green and his manager Dewey Hughes. There is a very moving scene at the end of the film. Petey and Dewey haven't spoken for years after Petey has sabotaged his appearance on The Tonight Show that Dewey has set up for him. Dewey accuses him of being a low-life ex-con, the same as his incarcerated older brother. They sever their business partnership as well as their friendship.



As time passes Dewey realizes the error of his ways and goes to Petey to make things right. At this point Petey is dying. In a moving scene he goes to see Petey and the two reconcile with tears and much emotion. Within a couple of minutes of this scene Petey dies and Dewey is seen delivering a moving eulogy at his funeral, expressing his love for his best friend.



After watching this touching reconciliation of two friends I was moved but also deeply curious. I wondered if the story had really happened like this. Typically Hollywood, the story was completely different. There was no neat, packaged reconciliation. Instead Greene and Hughes parted ways never to reconcile again. As a matter of fact when Greene died, Dewey Hughes didn't even so much as send a condolence card to the family.

After finding out about the true life account of Green and Hughes I began to ask some questions? What does the Bible have to say about reconciliation? Is it possible to have reconciliation outside of a Christian context? What is it about reconciliation that makes us crave it; so much so that Hollywood would neatly package it up in two hour segments? Is reconciliation so infrequent in our culture that Hollywood must fabricate its existence? What do other cultures have to teach us about reconciliation? As I prepare to go to Rwanda I am constantly confronted with the word and the concept.

In 1994 Rwanda suffered from a brutal genocide where over 800,000 people were slaughtered in a mere 100 days. Under the influence of propaganda and hatred, Hutus rose up against Tutsis savagely killing more than 10% of the population. This was not a case of strangers killing strangers. Rather, in many cases neighbors slaughtered or led killers to their own neighbors.

Yet in spite of this tragedy, thirteen years later Rwanda is recovering. And amazingly, victims and perpetrators are being reconciled. I watched a documentary entitled, "Rwanda: Living Forgiveness." This documentary tells the story of one man who lost 14 family members during the genocide, all killed by the same man. After the genocide he is convicted by God of the need to forgive those who have killed his family. He ends up going to prisons to share God's message of forgiveness to those who murdered during the genocide. One man in his prison audience realized that he was the one responsible for killing this man's family. Consequently he repents and asks for forgiveness. Now, victim and perpetrator travel throughout the country sharing God's message of forgiveness.

Though I watched this documentary months ago I am still astounded by this man who was able to forgive someone who murdered fourteen members of his family. Yet, not only did he forgive this man, he also reconciled with him, working side by side with him and calling him his friend. The documentary shows him dancing and laughing with the man who brutally slaughtered his family. His story is humbling to me, an American woman who has suffered much less than this who still struggles with unforgiveness.

What these stories of reconciliation in Rwanda suggest is that true reconciliation is found only through the power of Christ and because of his work on the cross. Reconciliation in Rwanda is encouraged by churches and pastors who realize the Biblical claims of 2 Corinthians 5: 14-21,
"For Christ's love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died. And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again. So from now on we regard no one from a worldly point of view. Though we once regarded Christ in this way, we do so no longer. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation, the old has gone, the new has come! All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting men's sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. We are therefore Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ's behalf: Be reconciled to God. God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God."

I know that once I arrive in Rwanda the message of reconciliation and forgiveness will become more true to life than it ever has before. Yet from this passage I've learned the following that is not only true for Rwanda, but true for the US, where reconciliation may be so infrequent, yet so craved that Hollywood finds the need to fabricate it. I've learned that:

*Reconciliation finds its root in Christ and Christ considers this reconciliation final. (There is no need to re-ask for His forgiveness or feel guilty any longer) In the passage it says that "God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting men's sins against them." God no longer holds our sins against us because Christ satisfied the punishment for them. Likewise, once a perpetrator comes to ask for my forgiveness, my forgivess and the resulting reconciliation must be final. I cannot count and re-count peoples sins against them.

*I am given the charge to become an ambassador of the message of reconciliation. My work in Rwanda must firstly stress that man be reconciled to God. It is only from reconciliation with God that true reconciliation will extend to the rest of society. In Rwanda (and here in NJ for that matter) I am Christ's ambassador who must bear this message. Likewise, I am convicted that if I am to bear this message of reconciliation, I must be practically living out its applications in my day-to-day life. (Humbling thought for someone who struggles with unforgiveness...thank God that I can daily depend on his power working through me, since I struggle to do it in my own strength)

*Reconciliation with God begins with Christ's work on the cross but also involves us not regarding Christ from a worldly point of view. Similarly, if we are to be reconciled with others we cannot view them from a worldly point of view either Because of Christ's work on the cross we become new creations who are called to operate by a new Biblical world and life view. This suggests that in order for any of us to be reconciled (Rwandan and American alike) both victims and offenders must reject worldly points of view against either party and adopt a Godly point of view instead. Victims can no longer view offenders from the worldly point of view as, "miserable sinners who have no hope of changing." Likewise offenders must also reject the worldly point of view that views an offender, "someone who will never forgive me." Adopting a Godly point of view allows victims to release vengeance and anger and offenders to repent and cast out fear.

*Being reconciled to Christ involves repentance and cannot be had without it. Repentance means a changing of your mind and actions. Reconciliation cannot be had unless offenders repent against those whom they have hurt. Reconciliation involves two parties and cannot be achieved unless both parties are willing to do the hard work of it. Certainly the work of Christ was difficult in order to achieve our reconciliation just as the work of victims is difficult in the process of reconciliation, especially in Rwanda.

*Being reconciled involves the offender giving the offended that which he does not deserve, We certainly do not deserve God's righteousness, only he deserves this. Yet through Christ, God offers us that which we do not deserve. This applies to Rwanda and the US as well. Those who have slaughtered others in Rwanda, (or to bring it closer to home, those who have offended me) do not deserve forgiveness and reconciliation. Yet it is clear from this passage, that I also, do not deserve forgiveness and reconciliation. None of us really deserve any measure of reconciliation and forgiveness. The only way we can obtain it is through the work of Christ on the cross. Therefore, if God was willing to offer reconciliation to me, someone who does not deserve it, certainly I can offer it to others. Just as compelling, I realize that if this man in Rwanda can forgive someone who has slaughtered fourteen members of his family, surely I can forgive those who have sinned against me in much less drastic ways.

I know that God has chosen to send me to Rwanda for a reason. Firstly, I am to be his ambassador of the message of reconciliation, urging Rwandans to be reconciled to God and to others. Yet, I suspect that God has other purposes in mind in sending me to this country that is daily confronted with the challenges of forgiveness and reconciliation. I believe that he wants to challenge me to discover what true forgiveness and reconciliation is and to become a woman who seeks after that with all her heart; a woman who is willing to let go of past hurt and forgive - then go the extra step and be reconciled with those who are the offenders. Likewise, being confronted with the stories of Rwandans who have repented and sought forgiveness from those whom they have hurt, I feel God tugging at my heart to compel me to seek forgiveness from those I have offended.

Above all it is my prayer for myself, for Rwandans and for all of us, that reconciliation will become such a part of our daily lives that it does not need to be a theme fabricated by Hollywood. Rather a I pray that it becomes a strong thread weaving through the fabric of all of our daily lives.

Frequently Asked Questions

How long will you be in Rwanda?

My initial term is three years. However, I am very open to being in Rwanda for longer. I'll be there for as long as God wants me there. (I would come home for a short time after three years though!)

What organization are you going to Rwanda with?

I am going to Rwanda as Hunger Core missionary with Food for the Hungry. Food for the Hungry is a Christian relief and development organization ministering in over 26 countries worldwide. For more information please visit http://www.fh.org/

When do you anticipate leaving for Rwanda?

There are two factors that influence when I will leave: having 100% of my monthly support raised in pledges and all of my oubound costs and attending the Phase II training held onsite at a Food for the Hungry ministry location. Phase II is held in April and September. The quicker I raise support the quicker I will be able to attend Phase II and go to the field. With that said I am aiming to leave for Rwanda in late summer or early fall 2008.



Why would you ever want to go to Rwanda?

God calls us all to different things. He has called me to the poor and confirmed that call in my life three separate times. I have a heart for children and the poor. Rwanda is where my gifts, calling and desire can be best used by God.

What will you be doing in Rwanda?

I'll be working for Food for the Hungry's Child Development program designing curriculum to help children develop a Biblical world and life view and training Christian education workers.

What is Rwanda like?

Rwanda is a beautiful country nicknamed, "The Land of a Thousand Hills". There are lakes, mountains and lush forests. Safari lovers love it's rich wildlife like zebra, waterbuck, hippopotamus, workhog, impala, buffalo, and elephants. It is also a very poor country. 84% of it's population live on less than $2 a day. Most Rwandans are subsistence farmers. Rwandans eat bananas, legumes, sweet potatoes, maize, cassava and potatoes.

How can I become involved in your ministry?

Please prayerfully consider becoming a prayer and/or financial partner in the ministry in Rwanda. When you commit to praying and financially supporting me, I become your ambassador, your partner in Food for the Hungry's ministry to the poor in Rwanda. Please visit my missionary page at http://www.fh.org/missionary61011 to learn more.



Why do you have to raise support?

Food for the Hungry asks all of its Hunger Core missionaries to raise support to cover their living and ministry costs so more funds can go to programs in the countries they minister in.



If you're not leaving for the field right now, why are you asking for support now?

In order to be able to leave for the field, I must have 100% of my monthly support amount pledged in advance. Though you may begin giving monthly pledges now (that money would go towards my outbound costs) pledges that are pledged in advance help Food for the Hungry be able to give the field a better idea of when I will be able to join them.



Are you scared?

Sure, who wouldn't be? Though I am afraid of the unknown a little bit, I am confident that God has called me to Rwanda and will take care of me. Really, I'm more excited than I am nervous!



What are you excited about?

I'm excited to obey God's call in my life. I'm excited about making an impact in childrens' lives in Rwanda. I love kids and cannot wait to meet and get to know precious Rwandan children. Even more, I am excited about doing things that will encourage them to develop a Biblical world and life view. I'm excited about living overseas again; I can't wait to experience the new sights, sounds, tastes and smells.

Is Rwanda safe?

Most of Rwanda has been calm since the war and genocide ended in July 1994.

How can I get in contact with you?

I would love to chat with you more about Rwanda. Please feel free to email me at my Food for the Hungry email: kjacobsen@fhi.net or my personal email: karenljacobsen@yahoo.com You can also call me on my cell at 973-508-5354. I would welcome the opportunity to talk to you.

About Karen and Her Ministry

About Karen - A Brief Testimony

I am a firm believer in God's words in Jeremiah 29:10-13 - "For I know the plans I have for you." declare the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future. Then you will call to me and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all of your heart."

Everything is in God's plan. It was in His plan that I would be born into a Christian home, hear the message of the Gospel at a young age and trust in Christ alone for my salvation. It was also in God's plan that I would have early and regular exposure to missions and missionaries. (A special thank you to all the Brookdale missionaries reading this blog. Your lives have inspired me!) God planned to call me to the mission field and confirm a particular call to the poor three times: in Hungary, Lebanon and Bolivia. It was also in God's plan to equip me with the temperament to make me sensitive to work among the poor. I was and still am, the girl with many, many questions. Since a young age I have been concerned with issues of justice and fairness and have questioned the immense suffering in the world.

Yet God did not leave me with questions only. Rather he used those questions to drive me to Him; to "call out to Him and to seek Him and find Him by seeking after him with all my heart." Not only have those questions driven me to God they have driven me to action. It is my immense privilege to see this action come to fruition in Rwanda. In 2008 I will join Food for the Hungry's team in Kigali, Rwanda working to meet Rwandans' physical and spiritual hungers.

About Food for the Hungry

Food for the Hungry is a Christian relief and development organization committed to the ministry of reconciliation found in 2 Corinthians 5:18-20, "All this is from God who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting men's sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. We are therefore Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us."

As a Food for the Hungry missionary I will be an ambassador of Christ's message of reconciliation to Rwandans working to see them reconciled in their relationships with God, themeselves, their neighbors and creation. Surely, the nation of Rwanda is in need of this message of reconciliation.

Armed with the message of reconciliation, "Food for the Hungry is an organization that answers God’s call to meet the physical and spiritual needs of the poor in more than 26 countries. Founded in 1971 by Dr. Larry Ward, Food for the Hungry exists to help individuals reach their God-given potential. In developing countries on nearly every continent, Food for the Hungry works with churches, leaders and families to provide the resources they need to help their communities become self-sustaining. When disasters strike, Food for the Hungry is often one of the first organizations on the ground to provide and facilitate emergency relief assistance to those in urgent need of food, shelter, and medical care.

Our ministry staff members are also immersed in hundreds of developing communities around the world, implementing long-term development programs such as agriculture training, clean water and food security programs, church development, child development, nutrition education and HIV/AIDS care and prevention. "

It is my privilege to be joining Food for the Hungry in bringing the message of reconciliation and hope to Rwanda.

What Will Karen be Doing in Rwanda?

In many countries Food for the Hungry sets up Child Development Programs that seek to meet the spiritual, educational, health and emotional needs of children from needy communities. Rwanda has a thriving Child Development Program (CDP). I will be working for CDP to design curriculum that encourages Rwandan children to develop a Biblical worldview. I also will be working to train Christian Education workers in Rwanda.

I am so excited about what I will be doing! I really enjoyed working to help with curriculum and program design at my home church and am looking forward to the challenge of doing this on a much larger scale with a lot less resources! Honestly, I can't think of a more strategic place to be encouraging children to develop a Biblical worldview than Rwanda. Surely, we are all aware of the tragic genocide of 1994. Yet, I am excited to be part of a team that is working to present the message of reconciliation and the Gospel to future generations of this conflict torn country.

About Rwanda

Rwanda is a small, landlocked country located in the heart of central eastern Africa surrounded by Uganda in the north, Tanzania in the east, Burundi in the south, and Zaire to its west and northwest. The most densely populated country in Africa, it is the size of Maryland with a population of 8 million.

Rwanda is a poor country. More than 90% of the population are subsistence farmers, 84% of which exist on less than $2 a day. Poverty increased after the genocide rising 23% after 1994. Child mortality is high in such a poor country: one in five children dies before his or her third birthday. Life expectancy is also low: 45 for both men and women.

Despite its poverty Rwanda is a land of astounding beauty. Called "The Land of A Thousand Hills" it is filled with lush forests, great natural diversity and mountain gorillas, made famous by the movie, "Gorillas in the Mist."

Rwanda was also made famous by another movie, "Hotel Rwanda," chronicling the 100 darkest days in Rwanda's history. Hotel Rwanda tells part of the story of the 1994 genocide where 800,000 Rwandans were killed in 100 days.

Yet not all is darkness and despair. God is doing amazing things in Rwanda. Churches, NGO's and the Rwandan government are working hard to bring hope, reconciliation and resources to this country. The government is committed to reintegrating ex-combatants into their communities. They are assisted by churches who encourage victims and perpetrators to be reconciled as well as reintegrated. The government of Rwanda has also seen the necessity to develop its people in order to improve the quality of life within the nation. According to BBC news since 1994, the numbers of students attending secondary education has increased five-fold - to 200,000. Before the genocide, girls were not encouraged to go to school but today more girls than boys receive an education.

Truly, I cannot wait to become a part of what God is doing in Rwanda.